Random Thursdays - My X-Colleague

A week ago, one of my friends (we used to work together) messaged me to inform about the unfortunate death of one of our x-colleagues. Let's call  him Mr SH.

SH was a senior writer and editor. I was beyond shocked when I read the message about his demise. He was too young to die as he must be in his 30s. Kidney failure, she said. He used to be sick often but but looked fit & healthy. 

After 30 minutes of reading the message, I started crying. No, I wasn't close to him nor we kept in touch even socially after I left that organization in 2012. In fact he and me had a silly but a huge fight when we were working together. 

I remember he was the only one from the senior management to message me when I had to resign suddenly due to health issues. I was very hurt that none of the others did. And I was surprised that SH did considering our history. 

Image Source: thecripplegate.com

Did I cry because I regret that fight? No. The fight was inevitable because our personalities clashed. 

So why did I cry?

I cried for his young wife and 3 year old daughter.  My heart went out to them. I remember he was so happy when his daughter was born. He shared with us that they were trying for a baby from long but his wife had some medical condition due to which she had suffered a couple of nearly-full-term miscarriages. The thought that now his wife is alone with their daughter and he didn't get many years to spend with her just broke my heart. 

I asked my friend was he sick from long. She said that he was suffering from past few months and was desperately looking for freelance work as he had to quit his full-time job. I cried even more. I imagined a sick and desperate SH looking for work. Imagine the helplessness of a person who is terminally ill but still has to ask for work to meet the medical expenses. It is just beyond sad.

For everything else you get second chances. Every thing around us keeps changing. But death is the only absolute thing. I have a hard time dealing with death because you can't alter it, replace it, reverse it. 

I hope and pray that SH's wife and daughter recover from this personal tragedy and come out even stronger. God please be with them.