My heart hurts...

I love discovering new people, observing their lives, and reading their stories. One of the people that I regularly stalk is Logan Lo. I read about him on Speaking of China blog in December 2015. Ever since, I have been following Logan and his wife Alison's heartbreaking story. 

Here's an excerpt of what happened to Alison as told by her sister:

On November 3rd, my sister Alison gave birth to her first child, a beautiful baby boy named Nathan. Five days later while recuperating at home, Alison suddenly had a seizure and was rushed to the hospital where a CT scan showed a large mass in her brain. Tragically, a biopsy has confirmed that Alison has a high grade glioblastoma brain tumor, a very aggressive form of brain cancer. Alison's tumor is inoperable and average life expectancy is less than 18 months without treatment. 

At least once a day I checked his blog to know how Alison is doing. With every positive improvement I rejoiced and my heart sank with every negative news. After reading Logan's posts (he is a great storyteller and an excellent writer) about Alison, their love, life and son Nathan, I felt so connected to them. Nathan and I share the same birthday, so that's another connect.

Today I opened Logan's blog just like any other day and read, "She's gone. Alison's gone." I shut the laptop as if I saw a ghost. I turned it on again, read the blog-post, shut it again, went into the washroom, switched off the lights and bawled my eyes out. 

Image Source: Loganlo.com

I didn't know them personally, never met them or spoke to them or even left a comment on his blog-posts. I silently read their story. But they touched my life. I prayed for them often. They deserved to be happy. Alison deserved to live. Her son deserved to be brought up by both his parents. That family deserved to be together. Because I could see that there love is so pure and special and rare. She was his 'person' and he was hers. 

But she died. In spite of fighting so so so hard she died. And my heart hurts. The unfairness of it all baffles me. I see utter pieces of shit living a comfortable, healthy life. But a young woman who spent her life helping others, who lost 6 pregnancies, who was kind, who wanted to live, had to suffer so much and still die. 

I can't even begin to imagine the amount of pain he and her family must be going through. Life is so fucking unfair. My heart hurts so much. :( :( :(